Jesus' Biological Father and the Day I fell in Love with Him Again
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Transcript: People are inherently good, and all of the suffering—the hunger, the poverty, the war, the senselessness—is a consequence of trauma. People are naturally inclined to take care of each other and love each other, but we are stuck in trauma patterns that ripple through generations. Among these, there is one trauma that is the largest of all. Trauma creates waves: when a person is deeply hurt, they adapt to live around the wound. In doing so, their perspectives become distorted, their survival strategies become extreme, and they in turn traumatize others. Over time, this usually dissipates. Even the Bible describes sins being visited on the fourth generation, as trauma lessens over time. But there has been one key trauma, a massive trauma at the backbone of everything, that has kept the background level of trauma high in societies worldwide.
The problem with this trauma is that it is unspeakable and unspoken. Only now are we just beginning to talk about it—just barely starting. It is very difficult to speak of, and it is the trauma of sexual exploitation of the female by the masculine, particularly rape, and specifically daughters raped by fathers. This trauma has been incredibly common throughout history and only a few generations ago was even more widespread. It happens incestuously but is also rooted in a toxic patriarchal perspective: a man takes what he wants, blames the victim, and feels entitled to take sexually from vulnerable young women.
This realization was impressed upon me during an ayahuasca ceremony two years ago, when I had a vision. In that vision, a spirit showed me that Jesus’s father was in fact Mary’s father. I believe this, and it makes sense. Mary left her family, never went back, and her story contains events—like the census and the slaughter of the innocents—that do not appear in secular history. These are invented stories. In truth, this 13 or 14-year-old girl was raped by her father, and Jesus was born as an unwanted incest baby in a trough. He did not seek out prostitutes and the sexually shamed to lower himself; he was already one of them. He belonged to their community. He understood shame, rejection, being unwanted, being the worst kind of bastard, having no grandparents or extended family, and living with a tense relationship with Joseph.
It was precisely through the pain of this shame that Jesus opened deeply to spirit and connected to the divine. He truly understood. In a way, we are all that incest baby at the bottom of it. In my vision, I was shown that we are all blameless. Humanity developed from animals, and this overactive patriarchal sexuality is draining out of our society and our genetics. It takes time, but it is happening. The horror of it has been so immense that we have not been able to talk about it. For centuries, the church has even protected this exploitation of the weak, justifying men’s sense of entitlement. The crucifixion of Jesus was the symbolic burying of this reality, because Mary’s father could not face Mary or Jesus out of his own shame.
This shame of the masculine demanded sublimation. Jesus had to be crucified, symbolically destroyed, and Mary was worshiped because she carried the true burden: raped, carrying her father’s child, losing her family and community in one night, and left with nothing. For generations, families could not talk about this trauma because it would tear families apart. Women have taught each other how to suppress their memories, and society has colluded in the suppression because we were not ready to face this backbone trauma from which so many others ripple. On a global scale, this unacknowledged trauma fuels war, poverty, and countless other sufferings.
But now, it is beginning to surface. We must talk about it to move past it. That is why this political moment is so interesting: we are beginning to reckon with the patriarchal mindset of ownership, particularly sexual ownership of young women. Many groups have been exploited, but young women have borne the brunt and were highlighted in my vision. The patriarchal mindset of “he takes what he wants and blames the victim” is dying out. Younger generations reject it. It is ending.
If we can accept how we got here—acknowledge what has happened without blame—we can heal and move forward. This is a moment where the hidden is being dragged into the light of day. The things men have done in darkness are being exposed. It is time to say, “Yes, this happened. We all did this. And we want to talk about it. We want it to end.” It ends with this generation.